Saturday, January 19, 2008

It's Here!

So I thought I'd take a few moments this morning to discuss my feelings about the upcoming Pakistani elections.

Just kidding.

Not to minimize the elections, but I guess my mind is a little otherwise preoccupied. :-)

These past few days have been such a delightful time. In one sense, it's been so surreal. To be finally doing this myself, and stand in the middle of the bridal party line-up . . . wow. Crazy.

On the other hand, it's just felt so comfortable, so right. I truly have such a sense of peace and joy. Crazy, sick, delirious joy. :-)

Last night, driving home from the rehearsal dinner, I finally looked back and thought, "Wow. This went by so quickly." I never thought I'd say that, but now, at the finish line of this engagement season, I feel as if it truly did. And God has been so faithful. This journey of singleness over the past few years was certainly one that I would not have chosen, but I can truly say that I'm so happy that God did. It has changed me into the woman that was to be Brad's wife. And I know I have so much more to learn and continue to grow, but I trust that the Father who brought me thus far will continue to lead us ahead.

It has been such a blessing to be surrounded with so many family and friends who have traveled near and far to be a part of this day. It truly is so overwhelming and I'm trying so soak up every minute of it.

This will be my last post until we say, "Aloha" again!

Saturday, January 12, 2008

Paper Chains

When I was little, my sisters and I used to make these construction paper chains that served as a visual countdown to some exciting event. Each link represented a day until Christmas, a birthday, vacation . . . something that we would ask my mom every five minutes, "Is it time yet?" So, to ease her sanity, she had us make these chains and could just refer us back to them telling us, "Count the links!"

The paper chain is now down to seven days. You know it's close when the wedding date is now on the extended forecast on The Weather Channel. (Brad keeps telling me not to look at this yet, but I can't help myself.) :-)

In many ways, this countdown is so different from the rest. In order to get a good sense of my anticipation, you'd have to add up all the birthdays, Christmases, and vacations combined. There's no way I can adequately express my excitement.

It's also really different to realize that it's a countdown to beginnings. When we'd countdown to Christmas, we'd all celebrate, enjoy Christmas, and then go back to "normal" life the day after Christmas (except with a few more toys). When this countdown is over, my "normal" completely transforms. It's not at all a bad realization; it's just very surreal. I try and imagine what "new normal" will be like and find it's quite impossible to do. Makes me even more anxious to just start living it. :-)

And so, this morning, tearing another link off the chain reminds me of how much I miss my bridegroom and I can't wait to see him again. It also overwhelms me with a gratitude and love for my Heavenly Father who is so faithful to all His promises. Seven more sleeps!!!!

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Finish Well

A few months ago, when I was visiting Detroit for a wedding, Brad and I got to spend time with some of his extended family at a soccer game. We enjoyed a lovely afternoon laughing and talking and eating a great dinner. As we were getting ready to leave and giving hugs goodbye, Brad's Uncle Jim hugged me and gave me some words of encouragement before we left. They were simply, "Finish well."

I smiled and nodded my head, but he stopped me again and kindly and strongly repeated, "Finish well. Your school, your job . . . finish it all well."

Keep in mind that this was in the beginning of October, two and a half months before I would have been able to begin to see the light at the end of the tunnel and three and a half months before our big day. It might as well have been three and a half years to me at that point, because it felt so long and daunting and near impossible to finish. And yet right then, at about mile 10 in my marathon, I had someone give me a big drink of cold water, and cheer me on to keep going in this race.

Over these past few months I confess that there has been more than one time when I have wanted to give up. I knew I couldn't drop out of the race entirely, but many times, I felt like doing enough just to get by. And time after time, God used these words of Uncle Jim's to get me up and start running again. The phrase took me through my last weeks at North Way, my last papers in grad school, and now in my last days of singlehood. Now, more than ever, I can't wait for the finish line of these past few months to come, but I'm recognizing the need to finish this season with the same vigilance and excellence that I sought to do in the other arenas.

"Therefore I do not run like a man running aimlessly; I do not fight like a man beating the air. No, I beat my body and make it my slave so that after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified for the prize." (I Cor. 9.26-27)

I can't wait to receive my prize and start a new race with a running partner this time. :-)